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  • Phoenix Medley

Self Care Isn't One Size Fits All

Updated: Sep 28, 2022

In recent years, self-care has blown up on social media, and there have been plenty of benefits. However, like most trends on the internet, there have also been downsides. Instead of self-care being something unique and specific to each person, people have felt pressured to participate in the #selfcare trend in only a few select ways. Rather than showing what self-care is—a rejuvenative process focused on the individual—the trend has been towards making it a competition to see who is the “best” at self-care.

The self-care journey of Steven Gomez, Senior Director (and former client) of SEED Impact, is a great reminder for me of what self-care is really about. To give back to himself, Gomez takes walks with his daughters,

“shedding daily responsibilities to tromp through the woods and get lost in mighty adventures…”

Specifically, sharing this time with his daughters allows him to “...see the world through [his] girls’ eyes” and “be present with [them] in the few moments [they] have.” Gaining that new perspective allows him to get closer to his daughters and add some whimsy to his day-to-day life.

This recurring activity goes beyond helping Gomez. He says that these walks give his daughters “the opportunity and confidence to explore, experience, and dream.

Hearing Gomez’s story was a helpful reminder to me that, not only is self-care necessary for him, it is also for myself. It doesn’t have to be pretty or perfect. Its only purpose is to help release the stress that I am often feeling.

Self-care is often depicted as a warm bath, but I am more inclined to scream-sing musicals (which most people would consider pretty embarrassing). The incredible thing is that other people’s opinions don’t matter. My scream-singing is for me. It’s my self-care.

Gomez reminds us that there is no mold for self-care. It is distinct and personal. It can be collaborative or solitary. It can be used to energize you or give you a break from your busy schedule. Like Gomez, don’t feel constrained by whatever sits under #selfcare on Instagram. Whether bath bombs and scented candles, scream-singing, or adventure walks with your family, just make it your own.


Phoenix Medley, age 17, began volunteering with SEED Impact in 2020. She connects with SEED Impact’s client-partners and researches topics of interest. She enjoys writing to support their work, and as a way of drawing more attention to their passion, vision, challenges, and life-giving outcomes.

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